lost in jane austen

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Preparation H anyone? Bio to Bs

A few years ago when Barry and I were shopping at our favorite grocery store, we had a not fun thing happen. They had just installed a new check out system that announced each product as they scanned it. The volume was up pretty high, probably so people could hear it over the chatter and noises of a large grocery store.
Allow me to backtrack for a moment. At the time, we had the sweetest dog ever, a beautiful Bearded Collie named, Lacy. Unfortunately, through no fault of her own, she had an addiction to Pup-peroni treats.

Back to my story...so Barry and I go to one of the checkout stations with our basket of groceries. In order to help feed Lacy’s addiction, we had a ton of dog treats. When the checker started scanning the treats, it kept saying Pup-peroniPup-peroniPup-peronithe more times that the computer said itthe more people started looking at us. At first I think people thought that the computer had gone into a loop.
 

Eventually, everyone in the front of the store had stopped talking, the other checkers had stopped checking and all you could hear was PUP-PERONI…PUP-PERONI…PUP-PERONI… Everyone was looking at us, like we were the proverbial “cat lady” or in this case the “dog gentleman” and “dog lady.” Finally, our checker entered the last one. We quickly paid and hurried out of the store.

When we got to the car I said, “That was embarrassing. Should we start looking for another store?”

Barry replied, “I love that store, maybe we could just start buying our Pup-peroni somewhere else. It could have been worse, we could have been buying Preparation H.”
To that I replied, “We should probably buy that somewhere else too. Maybe we should start a list of things not to buy here.” I have a feeling we weren’t the only ones humiliated by the talking checkout system because the next week when we went back, the volume was so low, it was barely audible…and a few weeks later, there was no talking checkout.

So now, we can proudly march to the checkout station with our cart of Pup-peroni, Preparation H, super absorbent tampons, roach spray and generic gallon bottles of wine. Okay, we don’t drink, but we might have needed to start if they had kept the talking check-out system.

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Wednesday Giveaway

We've been absent for about a year, so we thought we would start a weekly giveaway to jump start our blog. You should have a pretty good shot at winning since no one knows we're here. =)

To celebrate the unofficial start of summer, we are giving away a pair of Victorian Style Sunburst Earrings. To add a pop of color, Pink Rhodonite nuggets and pink Swarovski crystals were used. The earrings measure approximately 2 inches in length.

Good luck!!

Also, I did an interview on Katie Crafts blog...hope you will check it out. http://katiecrafts.com/featured-etsy-shop-pedoozle/

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Soap Opera Reality Bio to Bs

Most writers steal from real life situations. In our next Emma Wood Novel, Lonestar Lonesome we've included a story from Barry's past.


When Barry was little, he thought his best friend's grandmother, Pearl, was a wise woman. He and his friend would hang out with her for hours and listen to her tell stories and impart "pearls" of wisdom and the meaning of life. She taught them how to change a tire in 17 seconds like they do on NASCAR. She knew who the good and bad wrestlers were and she always kept Barry up to date on her "stories." 

Back in the day before there were reality shows, there were soap operas. Pearl's favorites were All My Children and General Hospital. To Pearl, they weren't just stories, they were real...so real that when Luke and Laura got married on General Hospital, she sent them a wedding gift and no doubt added some of her "pearls" of wisdom on how to have a happy marriage, on the card.

Lonestar Lonesome will be coming out next month. Hope you will check it out and look for our version of Barry's real life story.



Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Scourge of the Witches - FREE FROM MAY 14TH - MAY 18TH!




The book reads like literature, but scares like pulp fiction.

Taking place in both 1809 and modern day, there is a mystery in this witch's story that will keep you guessing until the very end. And afterwards, turning the lights out and staying in your house alone...will be unthinkable.

Check it out!

Grab your free copy now!

Friday, April 11, 2014

We're not crazy...or are we? - Bio to Bs


 Do-do, do-do...do-do, do-do...think TWILIGHT ZONE MUSIC.

Once upon a time, Barry and I went to Panama City, Florida. It was in early October, the temperature was great, the water was perfect and we had the beaches and hotel mostly to ourselves. One night we were driving back to our hotel which was out on a peninsula and we spotted a tiny red dash in the sky. It blinked off and then there were 2 dashes in a line. Those blinked off and then there were 3.


Barry pulled off the road so we could get a better look. A forth dash appeared and then all of the lights disappeared. These were not tracers. They were too exact and the lines were too straight. We both stared at each other wondering if we had just seen what we thought we saw.
A few seconds later it started all over again, but they were now in the southern part of the sky. Barry decided that he should turn the car lights off since we were beginning to get a little afraid and were feeling very alone and exposed. We sat in the dark for about 15 minutes watching the red dashes appear and disappear and then it was over. We talked about the lights for hours finally deciding it must be some military experiment.

The next morning we grabbed a newspaper on our way into a pancake restaurant. After ordering, we scoured the paper...no suspicious light stories. We chatted with the waitress trying to get info out of her without sounding like "those people that believe in little green men," but she shed no light on the matter.

Years have passed and now, from time to time, we bring up the incident. It seems like if it were a military experiment, we would have heard about it by now. We're still not "those people that believe in little green men," or are we?

TWILIGHT ZONE MUSIC fades...

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Zen to Disaster...Bio to Bs


A hundred years ago, when Barry and I were first married, we went to the Japanese Botanical Garden in Fort Worth. It's really beautiful and there is a type of calm that comes over you. Of course I was with Barry so the calm was soon shattered. We were walking across a pond on the little round stones when
Barry pretended to "fall" into the pond, but the joke was on him. I will never forget the shocked look on his face when he hit the water and realized it was about 4 feet deep. I decided not to get angry since we were trying to have a fun stress free afternoon.



As we toured the garden, everyone that we saw seemed happy and peaceful. It was about the time we entered the Zen Garden that we heard the announcement, that the park would be closing in 15 minutes and we needed to make our way to the exit.
We left the Zen Garden and realized that we had no idea how to get out. At first we were casually walking in the direction we thought would lead us to the exit. After we passed a building for what we thought was the third time, we started to pick up our pace. And we started to argue since I was beginning to get hot and he couldn't understand why since his clothes were still wet from his "fall".
Then we had the brilliant idea to follow all of the other visitors to the exit. But we soon realized that the only people left had that same look of panic that we had. Where were all of the "you are here" signs? What had happened to that feeling of calm...why did my blood pressure feel as though it had shot up 4o points? We started thinking about where we were going to sleep if we were trapped for the night and I was thinking that our "till death us do part" might be coming a little sooner than planned.

Then all of the sudden Barry spotted the way out. My hero...and I think the Koi were pretty happy too, since we had been thinking we might have to eat sushi for dinner.